Wednesday, August 12, 2009

life as we know it...

is definitely about to change.

i will most assuredly have to relay all of the fabulous fun that we had on our whirlwind beach vacation...because we had LOTS OF FUN...but tonight, life as we have known it for the last five and a half years is changing...

our first baby daughter, who came into this world at a tiny 6 pounds 4 ounces, is upstairs sleeping in preparation for her first day of...


how can that be? it feels like just yesterday that i was toting her around in her infant carrier. it feels like just yesterday that our days were filled with swinging, eating snacks, and taking naps. it feels like just yesterday that i walked her into her first day of mother's day out...thinking about how hard it would be to drop her off on her first day of kindergarten...

and yet, here we are. life as we know it is moving forward...and while i certainly wouldn't want it any other way...there is a part of my heart that hurts. i am truly going to miss her being around every day. she is such a light in our lives...and it's strange to think that she won't be padding around here in her pj's on a daily basis. miss madeline is going to miss her, probably more than i will...and it will be an adjustment for her to get used to her best friend being at school. they are bound like no other.

life as we know it is changing.

jeffrey and i kept telling her independently today that we loved her so much and were so proud of her. she looked at me and said "you and daddy keep telling me that". i told her that we were just so excited for her but that i was going to miss her and she said to me "mommy, but i'm just going to school..." - she'll understand one day when she has her own babies.

she and i went grocery shopping together today...just the two of us. i just felt like i wanted to spend some quality time with her before her big day. i just love that little girl so much it sometimes feels like it hurts. i know that everybody goes through this when their child reaches such a milestone...but it just gives a quick snapshot of how fast her whole childhood is going to go...and i just want to hold on to each and every frame.

life as we know it is changing...that's for sure...but one thing that won't ever change is the infinite amount of love i have for her, her sister, her unborn baby brother or sister, and her daddy.

i am abundantly blessed...and i don't see that changing any time soon.

my sweet ella,

how in the world have 5 1/2 years passed by so quickly? you are an absolute joy...such an amazing little person at such a tender age...and i could not be more proud of you. i am so excited to watch all that you become as you enter into the big world of kindergarten. i have no doubt that you are going to be an amazing friend to your peers and an amazing student. i don't know what i did to deserve to be your mommy, but God definitely showered me with an unbelievable blessing when he gave you to me.

every moment that i have spent with you for the last 5 1/2 years has been engraved on my heart...and while i always knew i wanted to be a mommy...i could never have imagined how much i would love you. may you flourish this year as you gain your independence...may you always know that perfection does not make you perfect in my eyes...may you always know that you are loved more than all the stars in the sky. you are my ella...and i love you to the moon and back.

you are destined for great things, sweet pea...and i am so thankful that i get to watch from the front row.

i love you angel...

your proud mommy


Meredith for the Davis' said...

praying for your sweet eldest baby girl today as she embarks on this new adventure --maybe even more importantly, praying for YOU and your heart because i know it aches :) i love you so much, my mere...can't wait to hear how her day was!

Liz Folds said...

Mere-what a difference a "blog" makes! Such a sweet tribute to Ella that she can read some day when she is old enough to understand. As I was reading what you wrote I was thinking of my precious Amelia. I hope that maybe I can be there for her first day of school but if not, Matthew better get it on
You and Christina are such good mothers and sometimes I want to go back and have some "do-overs" with my boys but then I think they have turned into such wonderful young men that maybe I did something right.
Thank you for sharing your heart and your love for your family. It is such a blessing to read.

Love to all!
Aunt Lee

The Davidson Den said...

What a sweet note. She's a big girl now!!